It's tempting to believe the lie that when I've reached my "goal weight", I'll be done with all this. As if somehow having less weight, less fat on my body will have resulted in less anxiety, less worry, less self-focus, more discipline and more Gospel-focus.
More & more, I'm coming to realize that the two ideas are not compatible. Becoming more like Christ is not dependent upon my weight. Achieving a healthy body is not what decides whether or not I'm moving in the right direction in becoming Christ-like.
However, submitting to my Heavenly Father in EVERY area of my life will move me closer to the sanctification I'm pursuing. And if I choose to see this issue of my disordered thinking about food as an opportunity to grow in Christ-likeness instead of a hindrance, then maybe I'm headed in the right direction? Maybe it's all about perspective? These issues I see as shortcomings and sin are already paid for and I'm already justified. So rather than letting that be a source of guilt, I will choose to see them as reminders that I'm not home yet. I'm not yet at my finish line.